Chickens and Leather
by Miniryu
Summary: *NOT *a lemon. 4+3. Quatre has a new favorite song. Trowa has a new fear. Nothing is what it seems. ... Well, sorta. At least someone gets a laugh!


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Chickens and Leather

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By Mini!! ^_^!! [Tapakey@gte.net][1]

To join Mini's list, send a blank email to:

[MiniryuMadness-subscribe@ONElist.com][2] or visit [www.ONElist.com][3] .

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Trowa heard a light lilting sound. One which struck fear into his heart.

He looked around and his suspicions were confirmed.

Quatre was cheerfully humming.

Cheerfully humming the dreaded tune.

Trowa sweatdropped, but it went unnoticed.

...Quatre sure seemed happy... Just humming his new favorite song.

Trowa felt a sudden sense of impending doom swallow him up.

Quatre happily polished his teacups, beaming and humming all the while, seeming to get louder by the second. Soon Quatre's humming began to pick up pace.

After fierce analytical thinking, Trowa figured he'd better move to another room while he could. Picking up his book, the HeavyArms pilot crept silently to the door.

"And where are you going, Trowa?" Quatre popped up behind him and squeezed around his waist.

"... I need to go to the bathroom." There. That'd do it. Trowa smiled on the inside. He might actually get out of the contemptible deed this time. Quatre surely wouldn't obje--

"No you don't." Quatre slid around to face him, his grin seeming slightly corrupt. He put on his most innocent smile and began humming again, watching to see Trowa's reaction. "I need someone to keep me company," he said sweetly, eyes hiding his intention. One would think him innocent, but Trowa knew exactly what act always took place after this.

"...But I *have* to go..." Trowa tried to wriggle out of the sunny pilots grip, but Quatre only smiled more and wrapped his right leg around Trowa's. Shit.

"But what if something happens?" Quatre frowned cutely. Damn, he was good. His voice kept getting faster as he continued, "What if I have an identity crisis and think I'm a Werthers? Or I start to think I'm in Heero's shorts again? You know I can't call upon my uchuu no kokoro when in Heero's shorts!!" Trowa visibly sweatdropped.

"..."

"Troooooowaaaaa....!!" Quatre put on his chibi-est face and sniffed. How precious!

"... I REALLY have to go... bad..." Trowa could see no way out of this.

"*sniff* But I don't WANT to go in Heero's pants!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAA--"

"*_*;;; Alright, alright!"

"AAAAAAA... Hmm? Oh, good! ^___^!!!" Quatre clapped his hands together and put them under his chin, head tilted to the left. Trowa's impending doom feeling got worse as Quatre began dragging him by the arm into a room. Quatre smiled even more and pushed Trowa gently into the room, closing the door after coating the knob with Vaseline and then locking it. Trowa got a rather stupefied expression on the normally stoic face and sweatdropped.

He looked around the room quickly, searching for an exit, ANY exit. He sweatdropped even more upon seeing the steel-barred windows. ...Which were painted black. He scanned some more, but only finding some rather sinister-looking things staring back. He backed away from them and knocked on the walls gently. If one led to a room with a-- Aieee! ...Since when do you have a metal-reinforced room in a wooden house!?

As the HeavyArms pilot was about to try to bust down the reinforced steel door, Quatre bounced in looking quite mischievous.

He grinned corruptly and flicked his whip, cackling. Trowa jumped back. What *was* Quatre doing?!

More importantly, what was Quatre WEARING!??!?

"Hello, Trowa," Quatre said simply, smiling maliciously. Oh shit. Quatre cracked his whip again and fussed with his black leather gloves.

"...What are you..." Trowa started to ask, but... he didn't even want to know. He fell back as Quatre sashayed towards him, the chains on his leather jacket and pants clinking. This was just... *_*;;; Aiyah...

Quatre took the fall to his advantage and pinned Trowa's arms above his head, starting to hum a very well-known tune. Trowa began feeling faint. Human contact!! Aieee!!! ...Even worse-- full body contact!! AIEEEEEEEE!!!!!! *_*;;!!!! Trowa's eyes began to spin and Quatre giggled. This got better every time.

"Trowa... Trowaaaa... Trowaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...!!" Quatre giggled lecherously.

"...I don't want it..." Trowa pleaded. That was so embarrassing!!! If another of his fellow pilots found out... He didn't even want to think of that...

"Trowaaaaaa..." Quatre breathed.

"Whaaaaaaat?" Trowa was now half dizzy from actual human contact.

"Dooooo iiiiiit..." Quatre cooed with a grin. Quatre began humming again, very loudly, "And do it nooooow..."

Trowa looked away. I don't want it!!

Quatre got up and pulled the somewhat dazed pilot to his feet. He smiled at Trowa and giggled.

"I don't wannaaaa..."

"Trowa, my uchuu no kokoro is getting pissy..." Trowa looked at Quatre like he was a stranger. Quatre's Uchuu no kokoro getting...? Pissy?!? *____*;;!!!!! Oi... Quatre looked at him and frowned.

Might as well get it done and over-with...

"Alright..." he agreed, but it sounded like he was agreeing to lay down and die. He winced for a moment.

Damn that cuteness of yours, Quatre!! You're so manipulative!!

"I am, aren't I?" ...Did Quatre read his thoughts?

"How--?"

"Trowa, you're so predictable." ...I am?

"..."

"You are." Trowa shook his head and looked at the blonde quizzically.

Upon seeing Trowa's look for a minute, Quatre bounced, LITERALLY, up and down, saying, "Now, now, NOW, NOW!!!" repeatedly while flailing his arms like a Shenlong with PMS.

Trowa reluctantly put his arms in that memorable position as Quatre began humming again.

The blonde instantly cracked up. Nothing was better than this.

Nothing was better.... [scroll down!]

**__**

...than Trowa doing the Funky Chicken dance.

~ Owari!! ~

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Author's Notes:

Yay!! Another story completed. I wrote this from a funny picture I got in my messed up head. I thought, 'Ooh, Quatre... in leather... with Trowa...' and then it happened--

'Doing the Funky Chicken Dance!!' Irony is great for comedy, folks! Much like tranquilizers for Spandex Boy when trigger-happy.

A Werther's is a candy, with a butterscotchy-caramely, Werthery taste. ...Never mind.

Anyway, they taste good. I couldn't help but put Quatre's identity crisis and other problems line in there. ^__^;; Anyway...

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